9. DO NOT ASK THE MAMA FOR SPECIAL DISPENSATION TO ITEM #10. Just don't. You'll be sorry - really sorry if you do...
8. The closer we get to Christmas, the crazier things will get "out there". Therefore, when shopping, it is All Hands On Deck. Everyone takes a hunk of the list, and we will blaze through that store like Marines storming an enemy front, and we will get out of there as fast as we can.
7. Anything and everything that can be ordered from the Internet or catalogs, shall be. UPS and FedEx are our friends, and we shall remember this in all interactions with their personnel.
6. Just because we are knee-deep in getting ready for Christmas does not mean that we abandon our usual rules regarding housework. You still have to pick up after yourself, you still have to make your bed, and hang up your coat. THE MAMA IS NOT YOUR MAID, and it will behoove you to remember this!
5. DO NOT ATTEMPT TO FIND THE PRESENTS. The Mama has hidden them well. Those caught "snooping" will find out that their presents have been returned in favor of "fun" items like three-hole-punched notebook paper, bars of Ivory soap, or a lovely new carton of Tidy Cat cat litter...
4. Check to see if you need an "altitude adjustment". Remember that all of the madness, the joy, the sights, sounds, smells and surprises are external to what we are celebrating. CHRISTMAS IS NOT ABOUT THE STUFF. It is about faith, and thanksgiving, and the celebration of a new life given for all humanity. The "stuff" is just capitalism at it's finest.
3. Remember to be thoughtful of those less fortunate than we are. When the call goes out (and it will) for donations for the community food pantry - or for warm gloves and hats and socks for the homeless - or for Toys for Tots - or any other need... we must respond. We are so richly blessed; we have a wonderful house to live in that is warm and safe and dry. We have plenty of food to eat, and warm, clean, dry clothes to wear. We have heat, and water and electricity. We have reliable transportation, and a garage to park it in. So when our neighbors need some help, we should, we must, we will. So when you see The Mama shopping for socks, gloves, hats or other things that don't seem to make sense - remember that Christmas isn't always about just you...
2. Our house - our home - is our refuge against the holiday madness. DO NOT ANGER THE MAMA BY BRINGING STRESS, DRAMA, OR CRAP INTO THIS HOUSE DURING THE HOLIDAY SEASON. You will NOT be happy with the result, I can guarantee you...
1. Remember always, that THANKSGIVING COMES FIRST. In every way. Not just on the calendar (althought it most certainly does come first on the calendar, as well) but we must always remember to practice Thanksgiving for our blessings. Our lives may not be as "perfect" as we would like, but it is important to always remember the good and positive things that we have. Start by thinking of all the people in this world who love you, and go from there. You'll be amazed at how "rich" you really are.
