Tuesday, August 23, 2005

Allow me to introduce myself...

I'll be your Mommy for the evening.

Would you like to know about the specials that I have for you tonight?

First, we have a lovely "Is your homework finished?" This popular selection is certain to be heard before the night is over. Quite often, we will serve the companion "All of it?" question with that.

Next, I can highly recommend "Get ready for bed, NOW". This is another of our most frequent items, and comes with a side order of "Did you take your bath yet?"

We also have the classic "Have you picked up your room yet?", which can be served with or without "Why are your shoes in the hallway" and "Who left wet towels on the bathroom floor?"

For ala carte selections, we have "Because I am The Mommy, and I said So", "Don't start!", and one of our most frequent picks: The Triple Name, which consists of the mother of your choice yelling your first name, followed by your middle name and your last name, typically with a "Come here right now!" or a "You are in SUCH trouble!" chaser.

Finally, our dessert cart this evening has a delightful selection. There are perennial favorites, like hugs and kisses, but we also have a special collection of "You are my little sweetheart", "I am so happy you are my kid!" and of course, "I love you".

A 15% gratuity will be added for pajama parties.

Enjoy your evening.

1 comment:

Magazine Man said...

Wait--no "C'mere you little sh*t!" on the menu?

Oh wait, that was MY mom...